Sunday, January 27, 2008

I'd Rather Be Bad Than Good

I'm grooving along paying bills while listening to The Jody Grind and this song comes on. Isn't that the root of all choices? Would you rather be bad? The song's really about not seeing a certain guy anymore because with him she'd rather be bad. It's the pull of the brassy.

If you were to do a little search of my google history you'd discover that at least once per day I search for, are you ready?

Amy Winehouse news.

Yes, I keep up with her exploits daily. I have both Back to Black and the indi release that wasn't available in the US until November, Frank. I've listened to both of them enough times to have memorized every word, every nuance, every bit of angst and beauty. People who know me are finding my Winehouse Obsession, well, odd.

You see, for the most part, all my choices in life have been of the "I'd rather be good" variety. Don't get me wrong - I have my vices and tattoos and explosive love affairs like any other girl. But for the balance of life I've made the good choices. When I was younger I had a really robust creative period fueled almost entirely by bourbon. Did I write really great stuff then? No. But I did learn I had something to say. Once I wasn't quite so soaked I learned how to control and shape my words. What amazes me about Amy Winehouse is that she has range, control and a searing honestly. Soaked. Soaked and pickled and on the absolute edge. She's made the choice of being bad and made it all the f'ing way. I don't think she has many moments of being good. She celebrated her marriage by carving her husband's initials into her belly with a shard of broken mirror. That's so bad it's nearly unbelievable.

We all know Good has rewards. Even when we have these moments of bad, we still strive for good because we know it's gonna pay off! Bad might be fun and it has it's attractions for artists - that razor edge is where most new ideas come from. Being raw and creating something new doesn't happen on the top floor - it's a dark, basement activity. Some lucky artists can go to that place mentally - they don't drag their body down, shooting up between their toes or carving themselves up, they learn to do it all in a place they can come back from. I don't think Amy's coming back. And if she does, she'll be Marianne Faithful - utterly ruined, yet resolute.

I was watching Project Runway this week (this isn't as much of a segue as it appears). One of the looks sent down the runway was worn by this lanky model with black hair done up in a beehive with a side pony tail. She looked hot. And obviously Winehouse inspired, without the missing teeth, bloody ballet flats and white powdered nose, of course. There was Michael Kors gushing like a GIRL, goofy smile and lit-up eyes, about how much he loved Amy Winehouse and how great the look was.

Watching a middle-aged, iconic, man gush over Amy Winehouse made me realize something.
At the end of the day, I think we love to watch people who actually would rather be bad than good. Especially when they make things happen. It's just too bad the creative forces being bad calls into the world eventually decimate the artist who tries to wield them.

2 comments:

Tami Brothers said...

I love this post, Michelle!!!

Really makes you think.

Keep it up....

Tami

Tami Brothers said...

Hey Michelle,

Just wanted to let you know that I tagged you to list six unimportant things we didn't know about you...

Check out my blog for more information on this...

Have fun!!!

Tami